Defining and Refining Years Part 1-Foreclosure

Posted on 02. Dec, 2009 by Setema Gali in Adversity, Paradigm Shift

My first home, I built, designed and moved into in 2006...we would lose this home and much more two and a half years later

Defining and Refining Years Part 2-My 5 Cars Got Repossessed!

Defining and Refining Years Part 3-LIQUIDATION

Exactly a year ago I moved my family from our home in Provo, UT. Although it was by choice to move we were highly motivated to move. I had lost my job, my companies, my investments, my partners and more importantly my pride. We were being kicked out by the bank because our home had foreclosed.

It was the week of Thanksgiving 2008 and my entire family helped us move. Neighbors and people from our ward helped us pack up, load up and relocate.

I was sad to leave. We had lived in this home for nearly two and a half years. It was our very first home plus I built it.

Many memories had been created in this home.

The birth of our first child
Numerous family parties
Birthday parties
Church activities with the youth
Firesides in our home
Family home evenings
Countless prayers came from our home in Provo.

A good friend of mine offered his home to us. It was vacant and would foreclose within several months. I felt that it was the right place for us to go. It was a blessing from heaven.

I packed up our home and relocated to Highland, UT. I knew going into this home we only had 4 months there but my good friend said to take advantage of it. No rent for four months was a good thing.

One of our first family parties back in 2006

Thanksgiving 2008 was unforgettable. We had just barely moved in to this temporary home and then ate at Golden Corral for Thanksgiving.

As a man, a provider, the protector and the presider of the home it is humiliating and embarrassing when you’re unable to provide for your family especially when you recently were able to provide

abundantly for your family.

If you’ve experienced any type of job loss, pay cut or challenge with the economy then you know exactly what I”m talking about.

One thing I’ve learned through all of this is that our faith will be tried and tested. We will be tried and tested, maybe refined and purified are the better choice of words.

I had a choice. I could either choose to learn, to be refined and to be humble or I could choose to be a victim, feel sorry for myself and blame others.

I chose the first.

It is moments like this that truly define who we are.

Are you choosing to be refined through your challenges or are you playing the victim role?

I often say “I am the man who loves his life.” I love my life, not because it’s easy and not because I don’t face challenges. I love my life because I clearly see God’s hand in it and the opportunity to become more like Him and His son.

The past two and a half years have been defining to say the least.

My pride was rocked.

I designed the kitchen to fit a lot of people. We had so many great memories in this home. We were sad to lose it and leave.

My ego was hurt.

I was incredibly embarrassed.

I felt like I had failed.

These were hard times on me.

Have you ever had to eat HUMBLE PIE for a while because you just didn’t get it?

We must learn the lessons and accept responsibility for our actions.

I personally made choices that took me down this road and I am grateful for the experience (although I was depressed beyond measure) because of what it taught me.

If you’ve ever gone through this I ask you to leave a comment below. Or if you’ve known someone who has gone through this…

HOW DID YOU OR THEY DO IT? What helped you? Leave a comment…

To be continued….

Setema Gali

ps-I’d love to hear your thoughts on this blog post. You can even disguise your name if you are ashamed of losing your home. I’ve learned so much from it. Thanks for the comment!! Your friend Setema

Defining and Refining Years Part 2-My 5 Cars Got Repossessed!

Defining and Refining Years Part 3-LIQUIDATION

Tags: foreclosure, Setema Gali

17 Responses to “Defining and Refining Years Part 1-Foreclosure”

Mom

02. Dec, 2009

Wow! I miss all the parties and family get togethers we had in this home. Those were great times, of course we still have great times even nowat two locations. Your house and Dennis’s house. The Lord will teach us many things through our experiences, good or bad. I have watched you move and move and we, your family have stood by you through thick and thin. The love of our entire family becomes stronger during times of need. I truly feel the Lords will see all of us through. Keep the faith, smile and know we are all here for this family.
Martin Aiono

02. Dec, 2009

“Inspiring and Humbling.” We can all draw strength through your attitude and drive, but most of all… your faith.”

-Martin Aiono
Wendi Keller

02. Dec, 2009

Thanks Setema…I appreciate your willingness to share, and the spirit with which it is done. We recently had to leave a home we loved and downsize due to a downturn in our business. It has been difficult, but we have also been greatly blessed, and we know this experience will make us a stronger, happier family, if we let it.
I did not get the chance to know you in HS, but I’d like you to know I have a lot of respect for you, and what you are working to do. Good luck in all your pursuits, and God bless!

Wendi Keller
Patrick McMillan

03. Dec, 2009

Tema – you’re an amazing man! I remember that I first met you around that time when you first moved into your house, and we’ve both done some amazing things, and lost some amazing things since then. I want you to know how much I appreciate you – your friendship, your example, your attitude, your family, your business sense and perspectives. You truly are one of the “great and noble ones.” Thank you, brother!

-Patrick McMillan
Sharon Fuimaono Vaeao

03. Dec, 2009

Thank you for sharing….My family and I also have very fun memories in this home. Thank you for being a great example in life and faith. Love you.
Maria Carr

03. Dec, 2009

I’m grateful that your mother forwarded this link to me. Thank you for sharing your experience. It is inspiring. I watched and admired your attitude back when you were SB Pres at MV, my son was a senior also. I see you have continued on that path.
Norris Alaiasa

03. Dec, 2009

Tema,

Your story, along with your lovely family are very Awe Inspiring. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and heart with us. You’ve reconfirmed what I’ve always known about you and may the Lord continue to shower you and your family with his choicest blessings. You’ve always a shining example and a beacon of light to all you come contact with. We are honored to claim you as one of ours.

Much Love,

Alaiasa Family
rosalind

04. Dec, 2009

Hi Setema
Thank you for sharing your personal life. It takes a lot to reveal and bear all especially in this technology world. In our buddhism, it is often taught that “a sword is useless in the hands of a coward” – given the best instrument or circumstances, if we do not have the wisdom to use it and expand on it, then it is as good as useless.

Our faith also teaches that there is no two ways in life – you choose to win or loose. I can surely see you have chosen the latter. Clap clap and may your words, thoughts and action spread the pylosophy of living life to the fullest while adding value. You did all this and though of a different faith, I recognise the many traits that is prevailing in our faith.

Hurrah for you and continue to be inspiring.

I will be cheering on the sidelines even though I am an alien at the other end of this world.

rosalind
Setema

09. Dec, 2009

Thank you all for your comments and support. Part 2 and Part 3 are posted on the blog. Enjoy. Part 2 is called Repossession. Part 3 is called Liquidation. You’ll see how I have overcome the challenges of losing everything and am rebuilding, retooling and reengineering my life, my business and my passions to create value in the world and to create a legacy that will continue to create value long after I pass away.
rich wright

02. Apr, 2010

Tema,
II can relate. The past 6 years for me have been the hardest of my life! Most of the things that have happened to me are a consequence of poor choices in life and not being willing to listen and learn. As you know, I have a great degree that allows me to make good money! Certain choices that I made led me to also have a house foreclosed on, my dream truck repossessed, and a nasty divorce! After nearly 2 years of depression and struggling to find work, I decided that I needed to understand what the Lord was trying to get me to learn. While working to understand Gods plan for me, I have found myself and better understand the atonement! The Lord blessed me with a second chance at a family and I have a great new job!! While I continue to struggle financially and don’t drive a 50k truck, I am the happiest I have ever been in my life! I am also a man who loves his life and takes advantage of every opportunity to learn and understand Gods plan! I learned quickly that God can’t steer a parked car and needs us to make decisions – he can always redirect if we are in willing to listen and change course! Thanks for your encouragement, example and friendship! Good luck with your endeavors!
Setema Gali

11. Apr, 2010

Rich thank you so much brother. keep moving forward…pressing forward in faith.
Linda Knudsen

16. Apr, 2010

several homes. several vehicles. “A Lot” of money lost in poor investments. Sold my baby grand and husband got a hernia- operation cost more than we got for the piano! At school my son was learning about the Bank of Kirtland. Many saints fell away because of the financial trials… soon after, the saints were commanded to endure even more trials as they moved west. The previous time was a time of refining. The strong who endured were prepared to move west. My son likened it to us… are we being refined now? Will those who remain strong now be prepared for what is ahead? We are learning how to do things in a new way. I have to let it go and let the Lord step in. I do all I can and know how and then step back. Miracles happen.
.-= Linda Knudsen´s last blog ..Spring Into Health 2010! =-.
Setema Gali

16. Apr, 2010

Ah yes…Letting Go and letting God! Each day my wife and I express gratitude for ALL that we have including our growth opportunities. Thank you for sharing your experience. I love that likening you shared. Have an awesome day!
Bo Vaoifi

26. Nov, 2010

In 2000 both my wife and i left our jobs to start our own business in real estate. It seems we had the midas touch for over 5 years…then the economy started on a downturn. when i saw things starting to change i got a job at the railroad just in time. After being at the railroad for 2 years they laid me off Christmas Eve 2008. By the grace of God we were able to stay in our home, a closing here and there. I had to go back to retail and work at a pawnshop until the railroad called me back october 2010. Real estate has been very strong for us this year and to this day i’m not sure that the railroad won’t lay me off again after four years, but even if they do..I know things will be ok. I’ve learned over the past 4 years that i can do w/o alot of the things that i’ve become accustomed to.

The one thing that has been constant in our lives, is the Gospel…My faith has increased inspite of my trials. My marriage is strong and my kids are healthy and faithful..

When my dad died this past April, for the first time in my life i felt pain that i didn’t bring upon myself…my dad worked 30 years as a welder and always had something cooking on the side as a Polynesian Entertainer. He provided for his family not only financially but more importantly SPIRITUALLY…for this i am eternally grateful. If my father would have allowed his temporal affairs priority over his family spiritual obligation, no telling where i would be today….So i say Thanks to my Heavenly Father and my earthly father…..and pray for the rest of us as Leaders to never stop moving……..take care bro.
Setema Gali

26. Nov, 2010

Thanks for sharing Bo. That is awesome! I totally agree with you…when we are built on the ROCK…no matter how hard the winds and shafts blow…we cannot fall. God Bless you and your family.